Could Mick Jagger Have Something As Comic, Uncool, As A Hernia?

This is, of course, all entirely speculation and idle such at that. But we know that Sir Mick Jagger is ill, ill enough that he’s had to delay the Rolling Stones tour of North America. Further, that he’s expected to make a full recovery and that the tour will be on soon enough. But there’s a certain caginess about what it is exactly that’s wrong.

So, to leap to conclusions from very few facts, perhaps he’s got a hernia? That being not uncommon in the aged those rich in maturity especially if they step up their activity levels considerably. And it’s also something desperately uncool, comic almost. Brings up memories of those ads in the back of the Daily Telegraph for truss belts – usually placed right by the crossword and the special offer on cavalry twill trousers. Something of a cliche of an audience but the trio ran for decades showing that it did in fact work commercially.

So, to Sir Mick:

Mick Jagger has delayed concerts after suffering from a “physical injury” sustained during tour preparations, sources have confirmed. The Rolling Stones frontman sent shockwaves around the world and fans into a frenzy when it was announced that the band had postponed their tour of the US and Canada because Jagger had fallen ill. In a statement, the band said that doctors had advised Jagger, 75, not to tour because he needs to receive medical treatment.

It’s physical injury. So, not cancer, diabetes, heart or blood pressure, all those other things to which age maturity is prey.

Despite panic from fans about the long-term health of the rock star, sources have confirmed to The Telegraph that Jagger is in perfectly good health, but has in fact only injured himself after training for shows. A source close to Jagger, who follows a strict diet and exercise regime, said: “It’s not a mystery illness, it’s a physical injury as a result of his strenuous pre-tour preparations. Doctors have told him to take it easy and to concentrate on his recovery. “

It’s not a popped disc as that’s not something to recover from in a few weeks. So, yes, our best guess is a hernia. It is a guess, idle speculation, but that we’re not being told what it is is the clincher for us. For, well, there is still something comic about a hernia, about the truss belt rather than the codpiece on stage. So, reveal illness, but not what.

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Pat

Less funny- but maybe a pulled muscle?

Quentin Vole
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Quentin Vole

FWIW Drudge reckons ‘heart valve replacement’.