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Hippie Roadblocks

Regular readers might know that I don’t think we will really leave the EU.

But in the interest of hedging, here’s what I think will happen if we actually DO.

An engineered crisis, that’s what.

It will certainly take multiple forms, but I’ll focus on just one type so we all know what we’re talking about.

I’ll call it the Hippie Roadblock.

Within a month of our departure from the EU, a small number of leftie activists will erect a co-ordinated vehicular sit-in somewhere on the M20. It will probably just be a few clapped out bangers and a few knackered trucks bought with Soros money.

In a nice little roadblock, they will stack the vehicles across all lanes of the M20, and then once the emergency services arrive to clear them away, they will use every means they can think of to delay the removal. The chaos caused by these hippie roadblocks will immediately be chararacterised as a Brexit issue.

Remainers Reporters will be dispatched to the scene and to the ports, to craft stories about how Brexit has ruined the country. Starving children will be interviewed. Victims of the roadblock will be sought, and the BBC will encourage them to get in touch. Within days………

“My wife gave birth in our car to stillborn twins!”

“My brother had a heart attack and died before we could get him to hospital!”

“My son is in a diabetic coma because we ran out of insulin!”

Photos of the children, and of the weeping mothers.

These are the depths to which the Left will stoop, because they think they are battling demons – no tactic is too extreme.

And so the headlines will scream “Brexit destroys country!” and “Insane Brexiteer ideologues must be prosecuted”

We might even get some more limelight-grabbing frivolous court cases against prominent Brexiteers, funded with Soros money of course.

All crafted by Remaniacs, in order to blame Brexit.

Of course the truth will come out eventually – a few weeks later someone will prove it was a co-ordinated series of hippie roadblocks, but the Guardian, Times, Telegraph and BBC will decline to publish it, or will give it scant coverage hidden away a long way below the fold, like an apology.

It will be published somewhere in the independent media – the CT might even cover it.

But almost everyone you know will blame Brexit.

As has been so obvious for so long (indeed since the very beginning) the EU cannot afford for Brexit to be a success, which is why they have craftily kicked and screamed throughout the process and why if they cannot prevent us leaving (which I still expect them to do), they must engineer a disaster for us after we leave – if they allow us to prosper, all the “Britain will suffer terribly from Brexit” wibble will be exposed as politically-motivated huffing and puffing.

So even if we would have been fine after Brexit, they must try to ensure we are not.

Like a bunny boiler who stalks her ex-husband to sabotage all his subsequent relationships, the EU will stalk us as best they can.

So be very suspicious of any apparent Brexit-related crises that emerge in the year after we leave (if we do) – follow the money if you can, and you’ll find the EU and their cronies behind every little stunt like this.

Of course once their supranational clown car falls apart they will be too bust for that.

I can almost hear the delightful strains already.

Parp parp Mr Verhofstadt.

Parp parp.

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