Today’s Brexit Joy – Turkey Twizzlers Are Back!


Moving on from the last outburst from Project Fear – the tits of every teenage girl will shrink two sizes in the message put out on social media for the kiddies – we’ve this absurdity:

Turkey twizzlers could be back on school menus after no-deal Brexit following new Government warning

There is no reason whatsoever that turkey twizzlers will be served in schools because of Brexit. They might be served because the kiddies like them, they might not be served because the kiddies like them. There being, as we know, that school of thought which insists that children not be allowed anything they actually enjoy. But the connection to Brexit is entirely fatuous:

Turkey twizzlers could be back on school dinner menu because of food shortages after a no deal exit from the European Union, following a new Government warning. New advice from the Government to schools warned that the cooks would have “to adapt menus to allow for product substitution” if Britain leaves without a deal on Oct 31. The guidance – “Advice for schools on how to prepare for Brexit” – noted that “schools have significant flexibilities within the school food standards.”

There aren’t going to be any food shortages to start with. The European Union might be bastards and refuse their own consumers the lovely food that we grow and send to them. But we’re not going to – on the grounds that even our government isn’t stark staring mad – stop foreigners selling their lovely food to us. That would mean fewer food exports – thus more food remaining in the UK – and the same amount of foreign food coming in. More food in Britain that is.

Plus, obviously, there’s no reason why it would be turkey twizzlers anyway. Even if we were to say, well, we grow (raise?) turkeys in this country, therefore it will be indigenous food that’s available, there’s nothing at all to say they’ll be breaded and deep fried now, is there? Turkey strogonoff can be made with the same bits of offcuts and might even be regarded as healthy.

So, no, Brexit isn’t going to cause outbreaks of turkey twizzlers on school dinner plates. Nor, sadly, reports of children actually enjoying school meals for the first time in a decade.

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It is precisely the reason the EU wants their ‘deal’, because ‘no deal’ means the British consumer will be able to get lots of food elsewhere at lower prices, as in the days prior to the EEC/EU, and in exchange export manufactured goods and services.

If the British were so dependent on EU producers, then ‘no deal’ wouldn’t matter to the EU.