Free Tit Jobs In Tamil Nadu – Why Not, Votes Can Be Bought

A fairly rumbustious approach to this story from southern India, the state of Tamil Nadu will now offer free breast surgery to women who desire it. With, of course, a special emphasis upon the poorer sections of society getting first dibs at the process. yes, of course, sometimes this is a necessary response to some other event, reconstruction after cancer surgery for example. But let’s be honest about it, much of it is indeed simply tit jobs not breast surgery. Done for purely cosmetic reasons.

Not, of course, that there is anything wrong at all with people deploying their own resources as they wish and if that includes firming the embonpoint then why the hell not? The bar should be set rather higher for those who call on the resources of other people to gain the same procedure.

So, why this then?

Thousands of poor women in India’s Tamil Nadu state have been offered free cosmetic breast surgery, including implants, because ‘poor people also have a right to look beautiful,’ its health minister said.

The southern Indian state is known for its populist schemes, which have previously included free canteens and providing thousands of disadvantaged people with goats, laptops and bicycles among other items.

It will now offer cosmetic breast surgery free of charge to all women – for aesthetic or medical reasons – with priority given to those from the poorest sections of society.

This is, of course, politics. No, not in the sense that Obama put it, government being just the name for the things we do together. Instead, this is politics – how do the unworthy gain power and keep it? By, of course, taxing some group of people in order to buy the votes of some other group.

No, this is not terminal cyncism, this is just the way the process works. As PJ O’Rourke put it:

But neither do politicians tell huge,
entertaining whoppers: “Why, send yours truly to Capitol Hill, and 111 ship
the swag home in boxcar lots* You’ll be paving the roads with bacon around
here when I get done shoveling out the pork barrel* Therell be government
jobs for your dog* Leave your garden hose running for fifteen minutes, and
111 have the Department of Transportation build an eight-lane suspension
bridge across the puddle* Show me a wet basement, and 111 get you a naval
base and make your Roto-Rooter man an admiral of the fleet* Therell be
farm subsidies for every geranium you’ve got in a pot, defense contracts for
Junior’s spitballs and free day care for Sister’s dolls* You’ll get unemploy-
ment for the sixteen hours every day when you’re not at your job, full
disability benefits if you have to get up in the night to take a leak, and Social
Security checks will come in the mail not just when you retire at sixty-five
but when you retire each night to bed* Taxes? Hell, I’ll have the govern-
ment go around every week putting money back in your paycheck, and I’ll
make the IRS hire chimpanzees from the zoo to audit your tax returns* Vote
for me, folks, and you’ll be farting through silk*”

The point about Indian state politics being that it actually is like that. The current politicians, in order to buy votes, are in fact telling the women of the state “Your husband will like your firmer tits” and telling, at the same time, the men of the state “You’ll like your wife’s firmer tits” – therefore vote for us! And it’s something that works. State governments in India do get re-elected by offering exactly these sorts of bribes to voters. As nakedly as this too.

Our only real problem with this sort of political corruption in our own countries is that better breasts for all would probably produce more human happiness than near all of the things our governments currently do to us. No, really, tit jobs or diversity advisers, what buys your vote?

Sigh.